Thursday, May 23, 2013

Posts Tagged ‘assisted living’

David Solie on Communicating with Senior Housing Clients

This is an interview I did for the Senior Real Estate Institute on January 17, 2013. The topic was communicating with senior housing clients, older adults and adult children. The focus was the two psychological hurdles that have to be considered in working with seniors: developmental tasks combined with ambivalence to change. The goal was to help professionals appreciate the role each of these hurdles and how to partner with them. The audio presentation is a good overview for all professionals in the senior services industry and equally useful for family members caught up in power struggles with aging parents.

Link to interview

No Place Like Home for Aging Parents? Maybe, Maybe Not (Follow Up)

Leslie Peters was my guest on a recent blogtalk radio show I host (http://www.blogtalkradio.com/solie/2009/11/07/no-place-like-home-for-aging-parent-maybe-maybe-no). I asked her to provide me with a “list” of questions that would help aging parents and their adult children screen potential senior living accommodations. She was kind enough to send me a list of questions that “often go unanswered.” I think they are excellent. Here they are:

Parent company:

Who owns and operates the community?

How can you find out about the parent company’s fiscal health?

Are there documents such as annual reports or audits that you can have copies of?

Is the company for-profit or not-for-profit? What’s the difference?

How long has the company been in business?

Staffing:

How is the transfer to a higher level of care determined?

Is there someone on staff whose job is to manage transitions from one level of care to another and coordinate communication with the residents, their family members and the physicians?

Are there state and community regulations that determine who is appropriate for each level of care?
What medical and other support services are available on site?

Is there a way of checking to make sure that your Independent residents are up and around each day?

Miscellaneous:

Ask the Marketing person to set up a lunch or dinner with some residents so you can hear firsthand what it is like to live in the community.

Adult children might also consider talking to some of the children of residents to hear about their take on the community, staff and services.

How are new residents welcomed into the community?

Thank you Leslie…

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David’s New Book


David Solie’s new book Caregiver Mind Maps is being acclaimed as “tangible breakthrough” in communicating with aging parents...

Learn more about this revolutionary approach in caregiving, download a sample, and order your copy here.

Blog-Talk Radio Show

Aging Parents Insights
Radio Show

Aging Parents Insights, hosted by David Solie, is a blog radio show that provide listeners with "new ideas and strategies” for understanding and communicating with aging parents.

No Money: No Comment

I was recently asked what to do about aging parents who had little or no savings but refused to discuss any aspect of their “money issue.” It reminded me that our role as adult children is not necessarily about problem solving; it is about compassionate containment. So many of the issues we feel compelled to “fix” have no clear answers. The best we can do is sort out what to accept from what we can actually change. Here was the advice I offered:

The issue of money, like so many other issues in the last phase of life, is about control. The best way to approach it is to reframe money as means of maintaining control. Lack of money takes away control. This link will take you to an article I authored on “communicating touch choices” that offers a practical strategy for how to do this:http://www.aging.org/i4a/pages/index.cfm?pageid=2103&textonly=1

You may also want to consider three strategies that will help you “hedge” your parent’s financial risk:

1. Buy a long term care policy with a two years home care/two years nursing home benefit. This assumes they will cooperative with the process (i.e. signing the applications and answering questions).

2. Start funding a dedicated “side fund” for expenses that a long term care policy will not cover.

3. If you parents own their home, become familiar with how “reverse mortgages work and when they make sense.

Lastly, you need to began discussions with local area agencies on aging to determine what, if any, community resources can assist your parents if they run out of money.

This is a tough end-game, especially if you parents don’t want to talk about. The article will help you frame your conversations. Be patient but persistent in your discussions about control and your desire to help them maintain it.