Magical Thinking Archives - Aging, caregiving and the journey through the second half of life

Magical Thinking

January 7, 2020

Feeling overwhelmed, aging parents may turn to magical thinking to solve problems. Like denial, it allows them a way to defer the complexity and burden of a problem. Opting to continue unsafe driving, ignoring financial limitations or rejecting help with…

How to Communicate with Aging Parents about Money

July 25, 2017

Older adults have a deep resistance to having conversations with their adult children about money. Why? It arises from three psychological factors that coalesce in last phase of life to create resistive barriers to open discussions about financial issues. These…

Aging Parents and Money

May 26, 2017

I was recently asked to write an article as a guest author for the Love & Order website on the ever awkward conversations adult children struggle to have with their aging parents about money issues. I began the article with…

How To Talk To Aging Parents About Where To Live

May 2, 2017

I was recently interviewed for an article entitled “Conversation vs. Confrontation: Guidelines for Effective Communication with Your Aging Parents.” In it I discuss how often the insistence by older adults to “stay put” in their home despite deteriorating circumstances prevents…

Spousal Care

March 14, 2017

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Failing In Place

July 23, 2016

New arrivals to our caregiver support group confirm what’s being reported in the medical literature. Dementia in the land of aging parents has reached a tipping point and now become the overwhelming concern of 80-90% of our attendees. The vast…

The Context of Caregivers of Aging Parents

June 27, 2016

I was asked to write an article about the context of caregivers of aging parents. What’s the scope and depth of their role? What are the issues they have to navigate every day? I found it was easier to create…

10 Questions Before They Move In…

June 17, 2016

In the communal world of pre-WWII, aging parents almost always moved in. It was expected because there was usually a local family network that closed ranks and helped take care of the elders. In the dispersed world of Boomers and…

Boomers: It’s All How You Get There

March 17, 2016

“The perception is that the baby boomers are very active — they are, you know, climbing up mountains, and they are a very healthy bunch,” says King, a professor in the department of family medicine at the West Virginia University…

How do you start the conversation about finances with aging parents?

January 9, 2016

1. Begin the conversation with a clear acknowledgement that you understand that control is critical to their wellbeing and you fully support their need to have it. Care giving conversations can quickly turn threatening to older adults who are hypersensitive…