There are three critical aspects to building a partnership with aging parents:Conversation, Collaboration and Accommodation.
1. You have to find a voice that “resonates” with their need to be acknowledged as well as preserve some semblance of dignity amid the undignified currents of aging.
2. You have to develop a “collaborative vetting ritual” that signals all challenges will be met with a process that respects their needs and priorities.
3. You have to build an “accommodation process” that signals your partnership will find a work around no matter how unsettling or complicated the issue or situation. Praises like “Let me see what I can find out about that…” offer both feedback (I heard your concerns) and advocacy (I’m going find out your options and help find the best choice and help you make it happen).