David Solie's blog Archives - Aging, caregiving and the journey through the second half of life

What the developmental tasks tell us about older adults

June 28, 2020

“Developmental stages in life are characterized by sets of oppositional tasks that need to be completed so the individual can move on to the next stage. These tasks are the drivers of personality growth, the internal engine that propels a…

The Obvious Audience No One Is Educating

May 29, 2020

I want to share with you a story about “How To Say It To Seniors” found a new audience unbeknownst to me. A few years ago, a colleague of mine shared how he used my book with older adults who…

Home Rules: We’re Not Going Anywhere

May 21, 2020

Older adults see where they live as the Alamo and will make their last stand defending it. We advance with logic, manipulations, and threats, and they use any means at their disposal to repel us. Here’s why. 1. The place…

We will never allow isolation to carry the day…

May 3, 2020

In his article, Coronavirus requires physical distance in end-of-life care. But we won’t let isolation prevail, Rev. Thomas Ryberg, a chaplain resident at Albany Med in Albany, New York,…

Secrets: A Powerful Form Of Control

April 30, 2020

…

One Good Day

April 19, 2020

In the end, caregivers accept the limits of what they can control while making the best of what remains—a shift in focus to one good day at a time. Honoring the here and now offers a nurturing space for aging…

Last Stories: Adult Children as Legacy Coaches

April 13, 2020

“People attend, remember, and are transformed by stories… Mary Pipher from Writing to Change the World Stories have a profound impact on our lives. On one level, our identity is the summation of our stories. When our aging parents enter…

Informed Control: The Art of Alignment

March 3, 2020

“I can’t believe I have to take a driving evaluation.” Nancy could hear how upset her father was at the idea of being retested to keep his driver’s license, “I have been a licensed driver for over 50 years, and…

Reset Expectations

February 24, 2020

The challenges of caring for an aging parent are exhaustive and quickly exceed the capacity of one person. Caregivers need to adopt realistic and sustainable expectations about their capacity to avoid sacrificing their health for unattainable goals. Acknowledging limits on…

And then an aging parent moves in…

February 17, 2020

When an aging parent moves in, no one can predict how it will work out. What looks good in the beginning can come undone in sudden and distressing ways. Adult children need to frame moving in as “one step” in…

David Solie’s blog