Planning Dilemmas

The Wrong Signals: Shutting Down Change Before It Starts


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How do we help our aging parents consider making positive changes in their lives? We want to help, and feel we have good ideas that could improve their quality of life. For example, we would like for them to consider:…

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Aging In The Wrong Place


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As the boomers pass en masse through middle age, it is assumed that they will undergo “generativity,” a term coined by the psychoanalyst Erik Erikson in 1950 to denote “a concern for establishing and guiding the next generation.” Generativity represents…

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I Don’t Need Assisted Living!


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An older adult is ready to move into an independent living community and undergoes a “pre-placement” health assessment by the facility’s physician. Based on the findings, the physician indicates that the older adult “needs assisted living.” The older adult and…

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When Am I Going Home From The Nursing Home?


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This is one of the predictable dilemmas of aging we all wish we could avoid. We can’t. At some point we run out of aging-in-place options and a parent winds up in a place they never wanted to be, a…

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Magical Thinking and Aging Parents

Aging creates complexity and emotional burden. Aging parents find themselves facing situations and decisions that are hard to figure out and even more challenging to manage. They feel overwhelmed and understandably look for ways to simplify complexities and ease burdens.…

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What I Know Now: Lessons From Looking Back


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Last June I was interviewed by Nell Bernstein, Senior Editor at Caring.com about what “I would have done differently” in caring for my mother based on what I know now. Below is my response: Talking With David Solie June 2008…

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Working with Low Income Seniors


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I was recently asked by a large medicare provider how my work on the developmental tasks of seniors could be used by their patient advocates with a predominately low income population. I thought is was an excellent question, and here…

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Aging Parents: No Plan For Paying The Bills


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A recent survey conducted by AgingCare.com only reinforced was most of us boomers know about the reality of paying for the care of aging parents. It found that 63% of caregivers “have no plan as to how they will pay…

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Helping Our Aging Parents Regain Their Balance in Times of Transition


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Our aging parents are negotiating a dense web of personal transitions in the last phase of life. As Nancy Gordon points out in her article, Spiritual Care in Times of Transitions(http://www.spiritualityandaging.org/pdfs/CSASPIRSep08final.pdf), it is helpful for family members and senior services…

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