Preserving Control

Dearest Son, Dearest Daughter…

I wrote How To Say It To Seniors for adult children of aging parents as well as professionals who work with older adults. In retrospect, that was short sighted. What I failed to appreciate was that older adults were deeply…

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Best Possible Day

Best Possible Day
Atul Gwande’s article “Best Possible Day” is compassionate and articulate about asking the right questions, over and over again, in a world where time is running short… Best Possible Day…

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Communicating with Older Adults: An Update


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I have been studying how to unlock the communication code of older adults for the last twenty-three years. My first breakthrough came early on with developmental psychology, a model based on age-specific tasks that are easy to understand, easy to…

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Predicting The Boomer Future…


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The best way to predict the future is to invent it. Alan Kay It’s 2026. The future is here, 14 year later. We are taking a sneak peak into the lives of two baby boomer couples that are now well…

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The Wrong Signals: Shutting Down Change Before It Starts


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How do we help our aging parents consider making positive changes in their lives? We want to help, and feel we have good ideas that could improve their quality of life. For example, we would like for them to consider:…

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I Don’t Need Assisted Living!


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An older adult is ready to move into an independent living community and undergoes a “pre-placement” health assessment by the facility’s physician. Based on the findings, the physician indicates that the older adult “needs assisted living.” The older adult and…

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Hospital Quicksand: Words Are Not Enough


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I was asked for suggestions on how to help seniors preserve control in a hospital setting where all control quickly vanishes. Interesting question I thought. What would make things better? And then I remembered David. David is a friend of…

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What I Know Now: Lessons From Looking Back


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Last June I was interviewed by Nell Bernstein, Senior Editor at Caring.com about what “I would have done differently” in caring for my mother based on what I know now. Below is my response: Talking With David Solie June 2008…

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Aging Parents: No Plan For Paying The Bills


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A recent survey conducted by AgingCare.com only reinforced was most of us boomers know about the reality of paying for the care of aging parents. It found that 63% of caregivers “have no plan as to how they will pay…

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Helping Our Aging Parents Regain Their Balance in Times of Transition


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Our aging parents are negotiating a dense web of personal transitions in the last phase of life. As Nancy Gordon points out in her article, Spiritual Care in Times of Transitions(http://www.spiritualityandaging.org/pdfs/CSASPIRSep08final.pdf), it is helpful for family members and senior services…

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